What am I going to do? I think as I flop like a boneless fish on my couch. I feel like an island floating to nowhere. Sheesh, this sucks, my brain informs me. I hoist myself up, head into the kitchen and pour myself a drink while I cook. This does not help my need for clarity.
It’s remarkable and maybe just human nature that we over think an issue and bury ourselves in mental debris, leaving us far away from what we feel. As a result we don’t connect with our inner-self, god consciousness or highest source. It doesn’t matter at all what we name it, what is of interest is that we separate from it, even when we know better.
I began to feel un-moored and adrift after publishing my book. For the first time in a couple of decades, I had no idea what to do next. It was like graduating from school with no plans for the future. All you can hear are crickets.
I’d diligently mailed out dozens of books in hopes for promotions that went unanswered. I was ambivalent about the book thinking, what if it can be better? Maybe it needs a publisher’s edit or more story development or more this and more that? And my mind uncharacteristically rambled on and on.
Busy with readings I’d enter my office every day to meditate and center myself so I can align with guidance and be of service to others helping them along their path. Somehow it didn’t occur to me to ask for direction for myself so instead, I waffled and I wane.
Worse, was knowing what came next but distrusting what I knew. Sound familiar?
No matter how much we practice working with our intuition, meditating, affirming a clear and open channel, we are in this thing called, the human condition and sometimes we simply forget that all the information we need is available to us. We need only to ask and align with our authentic self and wait.
If you struggle with your process, you’re not alone. It takes practice and trust and sometimes a gentle reminder. For me it meant creating a clear space, which sadly didn’t include alcohol. I do enjoy an adult beverage from time to time, but to really find my clarity required quiet meditation and asking the Angels and my higher-self for assistance.
Fortunately all fronts delivered and I’m no longer throwing myself around.
Thank you self.